Miss More

Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 2 | Review

In Movies on 03/12/2012 at 8:18 PM

“After eighteen years of being utterly ordinary, I finally found that I could shine.”

breaking-dawn-2

After 2 weeks of delay, I finally got to watch the so called epic conclusion of the twilight saga. Hold up. Let’s see what that means…

Epic: Surpassing the usual or ordinary, particularly in scope or size (thefreedictionary.com)

Twilight was actually pretty epic…. about one hour and some in. The twist towards the end was the only thing that this movie had going for it. That and my baby Taylor Lautner stripping and the 2nd Twilight sex scene. The latter was painfully under done, seriously Bill Condon. That shit again? So the first few minutes just cracked me up because Kristen Stewart’s acting sucked ass. Especially when she delivered the lines “you nicknamed my daughter after the loch ness monster” although I did like how she handled Jacob, throwing him out of the house, that was a preview of the bad bitch to come. Talking about deliveries, Aro and the Romanian coven (Vladimir & Stefan) properly killed me! Vladimir’s and Stefan’s accent were just too funny, they were just soo showy, loved it. Aro had me practically falling off my seat. Especially when he said… “young Bel-lah” and how excited he got when he met Renesmee. It was so bad, it was good. Aro was seriously creepy! I liked how they showed a bit of depth, how Aro is power hungry. Marcus really interested me, his last word before getting dismantled was “finally”  he looked pretty pleased that the Volturi was finished during the battle.

 I’ve got to give it to the Twilight casting director, this time round they did a good job of picking the actors who played witnesses for the Cullens. Did you know that Twilight has not just 0ne but two twists. J.Jenks is black. OMG. I was dying.  I quite liked Renesmee, she was so pretty as well. When I saw the twilight poster I was like, why she so big for? But it made sense to make her as “big” as she was. The baby version was a joke though. This time around the wolves didn’t look that bad. Maybe it because there was so many of them at the same place. Bella looked fierce as a vampire & I loved her new wardrobe, thank God Alice sorted that ish out. The Denali’s didn’t look that bad too, at the wedding they made me want to vomit but this time around, they looked good, maybe it was the snow that changed things. My baby Jacob was HOT as per usual but the eye candy of the film was Garret. He is sex. Let’s take a trip to the Forever More dictionary.

Sex: Referring to a man as sex, means that they are so HOT. So fucking beautiful. So delish. So sexy. So urggghhhhhhh! That they can get one pregnant just by one looking at them. The title sex however is exclusive, it’s the highest level of attractive a man can get up to. Sex can also be used to describe a voice

He's sex & he knows it

He’s sex & he knows it

And now, for the main event. The twist that made the film not completely suck ass. I knew exactly what was gonna happen, my friends gave me the 411 but I still loved every single second of it, it was that good! It was exciting & had me hooked from when Alice earned her bad bitch badge by fly kicking Aro in the face. And when the creep killed Carlisle. Shit got real. And I loved it! My highlights are when Benjamin split the ground open like a boss, and when Edward came flying out of there to get the mother fucker who thought he’d kill him. Honestly I would not have cared if Edward died, that slut Jane, killed Seth & Jasper. JASPER!!! I absolutely loved how Alice went all bad bitch on her & delivered her to Sam, she deserved that death. Then Cauis got dead too. Got dead good as well. The Denali’s did well. Aro! That creep mother fucker, deserved what was given to him. And Bella also earned a bad bitch badge, because of how she handled him. For once I actually respected the character. Kudos to her. I could talk for ages about that scene, I could watch it over and over again too. That was a real vampire movie scene, minus the blood and gore.

I’m gonna give the movie 2/5 because it still sucked ass until the battle scene and then went right back to sucking ass. Although I did love Jacob’s “should I start calling you dad” line. They also need to explain to me how Alice could see Renesme and Jacob’s future. Breaking Dawn Part 2 was stiff, bland, fake & all things a film shouldn’t be. I feel so sorry for poor old Bill, the only person alive to direct two twilight movies.

Thanks for reading, more to come.

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  1. […] Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 2 – Review (missmoretalks.wordpress.com) […]

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  2. I’ve only watched it online, not at the cinema, so it might be the quality of the stream… but did the baby’s face look as ridiculous on the big screen as it did on my laptop screen? THAT WAS CREEPY SHIT.

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    • Yes. Yes. Yes. Did I say yes? That baby looked as fake as frig on the big screen, I imagine it looked even creepier. A budget of £120 million and they couldn’t get decent graphics. *eye roll*

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